Relationship Over? Get Busy LIVING!

Just when you thought you had arrived on easy street. The years of raising the kids are behind you and you’ve settled comfortably in your career or business. Or perhaps you’re now reaping the fruits of your endless labor supporting your spouse/partner in his endeavors when the bad news strikes—he’s leaving!

While the heartbreak weighs heavily, believe it or not, this is the time to celebrate . . . and get busy living!  (Love that phrase.  I borrowed it from the Shawshank Redemption.) That’s right. Get up off that couch, out of that bed and force yourself to start living!  Here are some helpful hints to get your wheels rolling.


As hard as it may seem at first, stop talking about it!  Just stop!  We’ve been told time and again that it’s good to vent or ‘get it off your chest’.  We bring it up to family and friends, in therapy, or in some group we’ve joined and maybe even write about it. The conversation keeps him present in your mind and gives him an undeserving power over you.

Revisiting a devastating experience only brings back those unhealthy, negative emotions. Think of it as a virus that you continuously welcome into your system. Need I say what this does to your point of attraction? You will receive more of what you think (and talk) about. Change your frequency to new invigorating thoughts, challenging ideas and get in alignment with your goals. And don’t look back!


The very image of a woman symbolizes love, strength, affection and the conduit of life itself.  Yet, in a male dominated society a woman’s worth is undermined with double standards, second class treatment, socialization of co-dependence and subservience.  Change that channel and take stock of you:  your personal attributes, skills, talent and accomplishments. Respect and appreciate the physical you. That which you wish to change or improve upon, set a goal and do it! You will be amazed at woman you uncover.


Oftentimes women put the responsibility of their emotional well-being on the spouse.  While most men fail in this expectation, unhappiness ensues. Well, the time has come to make introductions to YOU and let the appreciation begin. YOU are all YOU have and there is everything to LOVE about YOU! In the event that Mr. Right does not come along one day, YOU want to be in a secure place, contented and loving YOU!


You know the dream, the real one that’s lived deep within since you born? Yeah, that dream!  Visualize it and make a plan to achieve it. You’ll find exhilaration in the journey, small miracles in the movement and the personal fulfillment for which there is no match.


Become the example and change the narrative about relationships and marriage in an objective way. Let time heal the wounds (and it will). What may seem to be “life throwing you a lemon” may in fact be the opportunity to walk into your greatness.  Be thankful for the closed chapter in your life and anticipate writing a new one.  Capitalize on that new found individual in YOU and get busy living!

About the author

Jennifer Burton

As an author, producer, screenwriter, founder of ALEXZUS Media and BurSel Black Wine, Jennifer inspires women to live boundlessly. Engage with her on a variety of issues from lifestyle and wellness to topics impacting women's social and economic empowerment.